The Mummy Break Challenge: Are You Game?

I recently read a post on a fellow bloggers site about taking a mummy break. Michal, of, rightly spoke about the importance of mummies taking time out for themselves, and made a lovely list of possible things to do.

But as I scanned down the list, I had the awful realisation that I haven’t done any of these activities in a long time (like, years!)

Why Haven’t I Had A Mummy Break?

It’s not a difficult question to answer. In fact I can answer it in 1 word: GUILT!

Self-inflicted guilt.

I feel guilty about spending money on myself. There might be an unexpected bill later on.

I feel guilty about using my time for myself. There are chores to be done.

I feel guilty about wanting some space for myself. Surely a mummy should love having her kids around all the time.

Why Haven’t I Seen This Before?

But as I typed all of this into the comments section, it dawned on me how crazy it all was. Why are my wants and needs less important than anyone else’s? Why have I made myself the lowest priority? Why am I still wearing the same battered black boots every day even though they leak?

I’ve realised that my mummy-ing has gotten a bit out of control!

All day, every day, I make sacrifices for my family. I love them. I want to give them the best that I can.

But it is a life-style choice that has gradually evolved into a habit.

I can love my children and put them first without making myself a slave to them. I am no less worthy than they are. No less important.

Everyone needs break, and mummies need a Mummy Break – the chance to be a person in their own right, a chance to reflect on how they feel rather than how everyone else feels.

Somewhere along the way, I have lost sight of this. I have lost my way. I have lost myself.Mummy Break Bench Relaxed

The Mummy Break Challenge!

So, I am setting myself a challenge. I am going to allow myself to have a Mummy Break. And to get the ball rolling, I am going to write down a list of possible ideas:

  • Go shopping for some replacement boots (see comment above!)
  • Get my nails done
  • Go on a date with the hubby
  • Play the piano for the sheer enjoyment of it
  • Plan something for my 30th birthday
  • Meet up with my old school friends for afternoon tea
  • Get my hair coloured
  • Buy myself something that I don’t need – a real ‘treat’ item
  • Read a book
  • Go to the cinema
  • Have a lie-in

It was actually a lot easier to write that list than I expected! Ooh now where to begin?! They all sound pretty good to me!

I’d love to know what you do for your Mummy Break! Do you ever feel guilty about it?


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  1. 1
    Something About Baby

    This is a great post – every Mummy needs a break! I think we do put ourselves at the bottom of the list of priorities, which is wrong as we do a great job keeping our family going so should reward ourselves! My husband and I recently had the day off work together, put our son in nursery and went out for breakfast and to the cinema. At first I felt guilty, but then I realised my son didn’t know any different as he would have been at nursery anyway, and my husband and I got some much needed couple time together! Now I’m on a mission to get some proper alone time with just me! I love your list, I hope you manage to get through it #marvmondays

    • 2
      Lucy At Home

      This sounds great. Well done you! I definitely don’t think you should feel guilty about this. It’s so important to spend time as a couple. Although on the rare occasion hubby and I get to go somewhere child-free, we probably spend 95% of the time talking about the kids! Oops! Thank you for leaving a comment. L

  2. 3
    Kirsten Toyne

    HI Lucy, This is exactly what I have written about this week. I think it is easy to forget ourselves without realising it. Certainly in the early days of motherhood there is little time for us but as our children grow it gets more important to make a bit of space to fill our own needs. It makes us better parents when we are content too. Love your challenge and would love to know how you get on.

    • 4
      Lucy At Home

      Yes, you’re right – it happens without us realising it. I’m not sure how much of the list I’ll get done, but I’m pleased to announce that I’ve been and bought myself some new winter boots 🙂 Hurray!

    • 7
      Lucy At Home

      Me too. I find it’s easy to talk about, but the actual practicalities of it are so difficult. I have, however, made the conscious decision to go out and replace my old boots, ready for the winter school run! Thank you for commenting. L

  3. 8

    This is so true! We always feel guilty. But if we worked we would get a lunch break so I try always now to take a little time out each day and imagine it as my lunch break! Love the fact that you play piano – me too – isn’t it just a wonderful thing?! #MarvMondays

    • 9
      Lucy At Home

      That’s actually a really helpful thing to say (about the lunch break). I am going to start saying that to myself! Thank you! And yes playing the piano is such a great way to relax (when I actually get chance!). Thank you for commenting. L

  4. 10

    Brilliant post. I’m lucky enough to get some time to myself – aside from when I go to work. I used to feel guilty but then I reminded myself that my son is happy and healthy and has a wonderful life and that I am still human and have a life as well as being Mum. We all need to take time out for ourselves and do the things we love to do. It’s important for our wellbeing. #dreamteam

    • 11
      Lucy At Home

      Yes it’s important for our wellbeing. I think you should definitely hold onto your me-time. I think I’ve just gotten out of the habit and so it feels like I’m not doing what I “should” be doing because I’ve got so used to being on duty all the time. I am really going to work hard to try and get things a bit more balanced. Thank you for leaving a comment, Rach. L

  5. 12
    Cherry @ The Newby Tribe

    Oh this is so true! I really struggle to take time to myself and even if I do manage a date night out with my husband all we talk about is the children and what we can do for them! I think we are definitely in danger of losing ourselves – you have inspired me to write my own list and see if I can do at least half of them! Thanks so much for the inspiration! #MarvMondays

  6. 14
    Fran Back With a Bump

    We’re off for a much needed night away next week and I cannot wait! 24 hours of child free bliss and a good night’s sleep and hopefully some much needed grown ups time (nudge nudge, wink wink).
    It’s so important to do some non mummy stuff like going to the gym, getting my eyebrows done and just not feeling like a frumpy mum. I’m now on search of an autumn wardrobe but find myself feeling old and laughing that bodies are back in fashion! #dreamteam

    • 15
      Lucy At Home

      Oh it sounds fab! It’s my birthday in a couple of months and I’m really hoping that we can persuade the grandparents to have the kids one night. It must be over a year since we’ve been child-free! I really hope you have a fantastic break. L

  7. 16

    I feel very guilty now as I do a lot of these things fairly regularly however, it’s because my daughter is with her dad every other weekend and for half of every half term that we have the time to do these things. Sometimes it’s very hard to find the time but I have to say I am so glad I have some time to myself. #marvmondays

  8. 18

    I have the same Mummy guilt! Since becoming a Mum I’ve put myself on the back burner. Last week though whilst my son was at school and my daughter was at nursery, my hairdresser came to my house, highlighted my hair. We had lunch and a girly gossip and it felt so good! I hope you get some things ticked off your list 🙂 #MarvMondays

  9. 20
    Mimi Rose & Me

    I am very guilty for not making time for myself, to be honest the last time was when I was getting my hair cut in April! I know I know split ends, ha. I am going to make more of a conscious effort to some time for me. #DreamTeam

    • 21
      Lucy At Home

      Oh I’m dreadful at getting my hair cut! I tend to go and have it all cut off really short so I can wait for months before I need to go again. But that’s because I have to take my kids with me if I want my hair cutting and it’s kind of hard to supervise them when you’ve got a pair of sharp scissors in your hair! Ha! Thank you for leaving a comment. L

  10. 22
    Squirmy Popple

    A proper mummy break is when I get a massage (once every few months) or go to the gym and watch 90s music videos on the elliptical machine for an hour. Bliss. #DreamTeam

  11. 24
    Kate Orson

    It’s so funny that we feel guilty about taking a break, because ultimately it benefits our children as much as it does us, because we have more energy and enthusiasm for parenting. i went away on a parenting retreat last weekend, and felt really guilty but when I returned I felt so much better! #DreamTeam

    • 25
      Lucy At Home

      Oh a parenting retreat sounds great! I fully believe that it is important, I just never seem to get round to it. I really enjoyed writing the list, though, and having the freedom to think what I could do. I’m hoping that’s the first step and I’ll actually go on and do some of it now!

  12. 26
    five little doves

    I love the idea of a mummy break! I don’t think I’ve had one in a very long time, even just an hour on my own would be amazing!! My parents have been away for the summer but when they return I will definitely be clawing back a little me time, it’s so important for both us and the children to have a break from eachother every now and then! #Brilliantblogpost

    • 27
      Lucy At Home

      I think this is one of the big reasons I’ve not had a break – even our closest relatives live about 2 hours away from us. So it either means a break on my own (so hubby can look after the kids) or no break. I hope you manage to get yourself some me-time and I will try too!

    • 29
      Lucy At Home

      Ooo yes. I love that feeling! You feel like you’re ready to take on the world! I do sometimes long for the days when I actually had time to “do” my own hair, rather than just sticking it up in a ponytail every morning. Thank you for popping by. L

  13. 30

    Wow this is exactly what Im all about! This is indeed a brilliant blog post! The tagline of Rock and Roses Mama is ‘Mama it up without losing YOU’. I am so glad I found your post and that other mamas are realising that you CAN still have a self identity and follow your passions whilst being an awesome parent; just takes a little break free thinking and letting go of the guilt. No mama should ever feel guilty of not being herself after childbirth as you don’t want to ever resent your children or regret that you didn’t take some time to just be YOU! Love it <3 #brilliantblogposts

    • 33
      Lucy At Home

      Yup 24/7. I really enjoyed writing the list and I’m pleased to report that I have purchased some lovely new winter boots! (Although I did take the kids with me when I went to buy them so that might be cheating a little!)

  14. 34
    My Petit Canard

    Oh my gosh, I love this idea! I read it and thought, oh my gosh, shes talking about me (lol). Clearly most of us mummies are as bad as each other. I am definitely over due a mummy break and think I may have to start making my own list 😉 Fab post. Thanks for sharing it on #MarvMondays. Emily

    • 35
      Lucy At Home

      Lol yes I think lots of mummies struggle with this. You should definitely make your own list. I really enjoyed making mine – just the freedom to think up what I could do if I wanted to. It was fun imagining, even if I don’t get round to all of them! Thank you for commenting. L

  15. 37
    Bridie By The Sea

    Such a great post – I am guilty of mummy-ing too much as well; every Saturday my husband says he’ll take the kids for a couple of hours and I always turn him down and we do something all together. I feel guilty leaving Emma with the boys and I’m not sure why! I think I’ll have to write a list of my own and challenge myself too 🙂 Thanks for linking up to #dreamteam Hope to see you next time x

    • 38
      Lucy At Home

      That’s really nice that your hubby offers to give you a break. You definitely need to take him up on the offer from time to time (but I’m writing that knowing that I’m rubbish at accepting the offer of a break too – I just really love being together as a whole family). Thank you for leaving a comment. L

  16. 39
    Mudpie Fridays

    Oh this is great I hope you get some glorious new boots soon! I’m quite lucky to be honest although in still on mat leave at the moment Hubby is playing holding the fort so I’ve just started a photography course on a Wednesday night and even made it to the cinema with some other mum friends to see bad moms! Would highly recommend! Stopping by from the #dreamteam xx

  17. 41
    absolutely prabulous

    I’m either very selfish or have a good balance. I don’t think I’ve ever felt guilty having me time from the time I had my very first child! I don’t know why so many mothers feel the guilt you speak of but you’re clearly not in the minority judging from the number of posts on this. I do have a feeling it may be a cultural thing if I’m honest ie different views depending on one’s culture/heritage about what constitutes good parenting etc. Everyone’s different; the main thing is now you’ve recognised it, you can go do something about it. #dreamteam

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