The school holidays are almost over. Back in July, it felt like we had an eternity stretching before us. Now the days are spilling through my fingers like water.
We had so many grand plans. We wanted to see and do everything.
School Holidays: the problem
But things don’t always go to plan. It is hard to share with your little sister. It is tiring going on adventures.
Sometimes, things that shouldn’t be annoying, really, really are.
I want you to know that I understand. I feel it too.
There have been some really infuriating days – times when we’ve just got angry at each other for no reason. Sometimes I’ve clock-watched, desperately waiting to hear the click of the key in the door – the sign that daddy is home and I am no longer outnumbered.
I don’t want you to remember your school holidays like this.
School Holidays: the fear
The truth is, I love having you at home! You are my funny one. You love to snuggle up next to me and watch TV. You tell me I’m beautiful, just because you want to.
My sweetheart, I love spending time with you.
As our time is drawing to a close, and attention turns to the last minute “back to school” preparations, I feel my heart aching.
Did I do enough?
Have I really made the most of this time together? Have you enjoyed being at home? Have I used the time wisely? Have we deepened our bond? Have I nurtured you? Have I shown you how desperately I miss you when you’re at school?
Or have I spent too much time just trying to “get through” the holidays…?
School Holidays: the truth
But what I am learning, is that life is not all sunshine and flowers. It is impossible to “enjoy every minute”. Life has many minutes that are wholly unenjoyable. It’s not that we’re failing – it’s that we’re normal!
I have made so many fabulous memories this holiday that I can treasure. I need to trust that you have too.
We’ve splashed in the sea, camped in a forest, and explored a castle. We’ve laughed and joked. We’ve danced (endlessly…to the Moana soundtrack…!) We’ve had fun in each other’s company and enjoyed quiet, peaceful moments too.
We haven’t enjoyed every minute. That is a ridiculous goal. We have enjoyed the minutes that were enjoyable, and the real challenge is to savour those times.
I will be flicking through my photos for many years to come, reliving these happy times; letting the joy sink deep into my soul. I want to absorb every last drop.
I choose to remember the happy times. I will replay them over and over again – the day you flew your first kite, the time we got lost in a maze, the squeal you made as you drove your own car (go-kart).
This is what I remember. This is what I will take away. This was our school holidays.
The frustrations and annoyances? They will evaporate. They are not important. They don’t play on my mind because I look at you, and I am in love. I look at you and my life has purpose. You are my happy place, and I know that this family is yours!
We haven’t enjoyed every minute of the school holidays…but we’ve had a brilliant time!
Now how many days until October break??
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