I’ve specifically mentioned marriage here, but it really applies to all couples. With that in mind, let’s get started…
Sometimes I Want To Kill Him
Today’s post is a backlash against the growing number of people who say things along the lines of “we fight every day, but we still love each other” or “sometimes I want to kill him, but I love him deep down”. I need to tell you something: MARRIAGE SHOULDN’T BE LIKE THIS!
I know it makes us feel better if we all agree that hating your partner is a normal way to live, but I bet that’s not what you dreamed of when you first fell in love.
Invest In Each Other
Yes there will be trials, yes there will be disagreements, yes this sucky world will throw everything it’s got at you, but cling to each other!
Invest in each other.
Time together is invaluable. You don’t need to go out on expensive dates, just do the mundane, everyday stuff TOGETHER. Do the supermarket shop together. Read aloud a news story or blog post that you found interesting. Watch Britain’s Got Talent and chat about who you think should win. Sharing your opinion (even when it doesn’t really matter) is important – it is how you share yourself. It’s how you get to know the other person. What do they like? What makes them tick? What really gets them riled?
Marriage is Everyday Acts of Kindness
Always be on the lookout for small acts of kindness you can do for each other.
Put his shoes away when he’s left them in the hall. Fold her clothes up when she’s thrown them on the bed. Quietly put the milk back into the fridge when it’s been left out. These situations can be niggling frustrations or opportunities to be caring and helpful. If both partners look to serve each other rather than focus on what they’re getting out of the marriage, the relationship will be much happier.
Bad patches happen. Work-life balance gets skewed. Mild irritations explode into full-blown arguments. Sometimes you might feel like you’re the only one putting the effort in. Sometimes you might just feel like being selfish. Sometimes the marriage is battered by difficult illnesses, financial worries, family crises, and the general pressures of life. These are inescapable, and they are bound to affect you individually and as a couple. But don’t accept that this is how things should be ALL the time. It shouldn’t. Snapping at each other should be an exception, not the rule. Don’t be sold short. If you start to believe that all couples constantly bicker, you won’t see any need to change.
The Happily Ever After
I hear so many people laugh about how annoying they find their partner. They make jokes about how lazy their partner is, or how they made their partner sleep on the settee.
But nobody really WANTS to live in that environment, do they? Yes, we can accept that there are times when marriage is hard, but we certainly don’t WANT it to be hard. So fight for each other. Don’t settle for second best.
Keep striving for the happily ever after.